Its a bright sunny day marks the beginning of 2012.May the sunny day is a sign of a great year ahead.I already makes a few resolutions this morning and in gods name I am praying for the best in me...
Its been 7 months since she left me.Yeah it was my mother.Until today I just couldnt stop thinking about her.I once read that for every person there are angels beside us.From the moment we went out to this world until the day we closed our eyes.And its not the 2 angels(Raqib n Atid) but it was actually our mother.She is the angels that god created for us,to guide us through this crazy world,to calms us when we are in a bad state and the most important things is to love us.She never stops guiding me eventhough until I am someone's wife and now someone's mother.She always be there for me eventhough I resent her.She never stops caring for me.But when she's gone it just the same when there are no angels with us.My life is much much miserable.There's no one to talk about, there's no one to tell how sad I am,there's no one to share my happiness....And absolutely today when I am crying for what have been done to me, she is not there for me to tell her.Yes she is not a pretty woman but her prettiness comes from inside of hers.People always take granted for her but she simply forgets it,she simply ignore it.But the truth is what others done to her it really take a toll on her.I guess now I am more like her.No one to talk to,no one to share to,and all the sadness i just swallow it down by myself.Sometimes I just think why there is no appiness in me anymore.I just wish I was 8 years old or maybe 18 years old when life is so much happier.But when I think back and think hard, things that happened to us are for reason. The most important reason is for us to come closer to god.She always wanted the best for all of us.And now when I want the best for my kids too I just couldnt do it.I felt frustrated.I felt sad.I know if she here she would be sad too.Us mother will always wanted the best for our children.It is a gift from god.But when only one hand clap it just not giving the echo sound.Why dont he understand it.Is it because he thinks that he is the anchor of the household he can do whatever he wants.Why dont he wants to see the kids to be a great kids.Why he trained them to be like him.But I just dont have the answer.....I been swallowing all this sadness by myself.At least when my mum is here she knows that I am still good myself,I am still a worthy person,I am still a better person.And now she's gone theres no one to tell me that anymore....Maybe I am too exaggerating but I just dont have anyone to talk to.So with this blog I hope that it ca ease bit of my sadness....So just remember a mother is not only a mother,a servant of the house or even the wife.She is the beautiful creature that god sents to each of us in this world to make our life to be more beautiful.Cherish all the times while we still can..
